27 Comments

what the hell do I do about my flagging career, Bess, what

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3 questions:

1) is it worth seeking your advice if I am not among the first 10?

2) how can I get more people to read my substack newsletter?

3) I seem to be in menopause earlier than I might have expected, likely courtesy of my breast cancer medication. do I need to tell JD Vance about the menopause? the cancer?

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lol hi HEIDI!! am i signed up for your substack or do i just follow it when you post on facebook? will go remedy that now :)

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Thanks for subscribing, my friend! And because of me, you are now no closer to Bess, but you can say: my college roommate's sister's husband's cousin is married to Bess Kalb. We don't even need Kevin Bacon to get there in six degrees of separation!

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What is the best way to end a friendship? Not for any big sin or issue that needs discussion, but boredom. Slow fade/ghosting hasn’t been working.

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Ok is there any chance that Amelia (see below) is your friend because if so 😐 but hilarious.

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Can we get a Buffalo Fluffalo prequel? My 11-month old and I have questions about Mangy Old Crow’s gritty backstory.

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Ahhh, I’m too late! How do I adjust to retirement when I don’t want to be seen as old??

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Ugh, friendship post kids!! How many times should I initiate plans / host without reciprocation before assuming the other person isn’t into a friendship? Tell me how to be understanding of this life stage without embarrassing myself.

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I love to tell everyone what to do; but it makes me both unkind and … often incorrect for other people’s choices. How can I stop being so bossy and such a know-it-all?

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What food should I serve at a 5 year old birthday party. It’s on a playground from 10:30 AM - 12:30 PM. I have heard many hot takes on the appropriate food for this seemingly straightforward event, but I only want your hot take.

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Dang, I am number eleven

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My 4 year old has recently become a picky eater. Should I care and try to fight it, or just ride it out?

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Bess! I want to be just like you (currently a copywriter, not a writer-writer). But also, everything seems kind of useless except for the idea of living on a cute little 10 acres with a few of my best friends. Please advise on what next step you'd take if you were me. (I understand this is incredibly nebulous.)

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Like the wife, can't take the husband anymore of couple with whom we previously spent a lot of time. How do we extricate? It seems so unfair to the wife that she be banished too

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founding

All I want to say is I LOVE THIS! All excellent questions!

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Unclear Bess as to the advice you were given, but I am confident that you were right in the first place. Please clarify what you were told you were wrong about!

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Is potty-training the worst part of parenthood, as my friends insist it is, or do they just not have your advice yet?

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no - its technology policing age 3+ wait till you have to change your phone passcode every 2 days…

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How do I explain the P Diddy scandal to a non-pop culture aficionado?

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Josh Johnson on YouTube explained it to me

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Refer them to the Kobe Bryant sex scandal.

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