Please stay safe. And about EATING ALL THE PRINGLES: I religiously read the "News of the Weird" section in our paper and one of the items was about a woman who was arrested at her local Wal-Mart for trying to get a discount on a cake that she began eating and claimed that it "came like that" as well as for riding around in a motorized shopping cart while drinking wine out of a Pringles container and I say that is #peak2025goals
This entire piece is excellent, but I will forever love “Now Princess Elsa is their mom and even though she has a tonally incongruent voice for her bone structure,”
Greetings from an all-refugee hotel in Santa Monica. I had no idea you were here -- thought you were still in NYC. Customary kudos to you for finding some fact-based, frailty-based humor in this calamity. Oh, and ... wasn't #4 part of the Chinatown movie (crazy coincidence)? "My sister! My daughter! My sister! My daughter!" Though we didn't know Jack's personal backstory at the time. Hoping he's okay too, since fire seems to have somehow jumped the 405. Ps for everybody: love your neighbor, avoid Fox News.
Now that's comedy! While being useful advice. What I like about the end being near is you don't have to bother with staying healthy, smoke 12 packs a day, drink like a whore in a turkish prison, and dip your pringles in coolwhip, who gives a shit? And tell off everyone you've always wanted to. Just hope the world isn't saved by some goddamn superhero 'cause then you'll have some 'splainin' to do.
Gregory reminds me of the Undertoad in The World According to Garp.
All excellent advice, which you don’t necessarily need a stressor of apocalyptic proportions to heed. It will work just as well for a regular stressor. 😉
Please stay safe. And about EATING ALL THE PRINGLES: I religiously read the "News of the Weird" section in our paper and one of the items was about a woman who was arrested at her local Wal-Mart for trying to get a discount on a cake that she began eating and claimed that it "came like that" as well as for riding around in a motorized shopping cart while drinking wine out of a Pringles container and I say that is #peak2025goals
This entire piece is excellent, but I will forever love “Now Princess Elsa is their mom and even though she has a tonally incongruent voice for her bone structure,”
Greetings from an all-refugee hotel in Santa Monica. I had no idea you were here -- thought you were still in NYC. Customary kudos to you for finding some fact-based, frailty-based humor in this calamity. Oh, and ... wasn't #4 part of the Chinatown movie (crazy coincidence)? "My sister! My daughter! My sister! My daughter!" Though we didn't know Jack's personal backstory at the time. Hoping he's okay too, since fire seems to have somehow jumped the 405. Ps for everybody: love your neighbor, avoid Fox News.
I’m in NYC! Stay safe ❤️
Now that's comedy! While being useful advice. What I like about the end being near is you don't have to bother with staying healthy, smoke 12 packs a day, drink like a whore in a turkish prison, and dip your pringles in coolwhip, who gives a shit? And tell off everyone you've always wanted to. Just hope the world isn't saved by some goddamn superhero 'cause then you'll have some 'splainin' to do.
If you really think about it, the tragedy is just a new opportunity to start a new (or old) fight!
This is brilliant. Thanks for the sarcasm and an opportunity to donate to a helpful cause. ❤️
Absolutely genius funny. Thank you
Gregory reminds me of the Undertoad in The World According to Garp.
All excellent advice, which you don’t necessarily need a stressor of apocalyptic proportions to heed. It will work just as well for a regular stressor. 😉
Please stay in my inbox
I am new to Substack and have been hunting for some other work with similar dark-sarcastic humor. Thank you. This is fabulous!
#2 is quite possibly applicable at all times