Bess, I'm on week 4 after total hip replacement at age 54, and had to learn the spiritual lesson all over again that I am not what I accomplish in the course of a day--and that it's ok, nay, EXCELLENT, to be dependent on people who love me and want to care for me.
Being a woman of leisure is less fun than I thought it would be. Nevertheless, I have been reading and watching a lot, including a lot more for sheer entertainment than I thought I would. For sexy, gorgeous, feministy period-piece fun: My Lady Jane. For all the cathartic tears and feminist rage: Maggie O'Farrell's I Am I Am I Am (plus it is very short so you get to feel extra accomplished the day you finish it).
And I've written a book you might like--happy to send you a copy--about the last time I was really laid up (with cancer when my kids were little. TL:DR: I lived!), How to Begin When Your World is Ending: A Spiritual Field Guide to Joy Despite Everything. xo
Goooooo Bess! We love Bess!! Your 60-year-old self will thank you for doing the work now to disentangle your worth from your appearance. A goddamned Sisyphean task if there ever fucking was one.
Gurrllll! Everyone here is suppressing intense curiosity about the specifics, so I will try to be good and do that too although it is hard. I will say that aging is not for the faint of heart and that process actually starts in one’s 30s, not 60s! Things happen, our bodies support us but then alternately betray us. Many of us want to see ourselves as staunch self-advocates but we don’t always know how to when doctors are not interested or when tests come up ambiguous. I’ve recently been through my own version of this and it’s not over… so let’s hug each other and rest and never apologize for tapping out for a while.
So sorry to hear of your health struggles Bess, and wish you much rest and healing. I had sling surgery last year at 37 boy was I in for a rude awakening as to how surgery makes you feel and what my “expected timeline” really was. Be gentle with yourself, day by day ❤️
I watched The Good Place for the first time recently and it was one of my most favorite sitcoms I’ve ever watched. Marcel the Shell with Shoes on is also a delightful movie and when all else fails, you can always watch Veep again!
Also, this probably isn’t news to you but Meryl Streep narrating Heartburn by Nora Ephron is something I come back to over and over again.
Prayers and all the good vibes for your smoothe recovery. Reading: Anthropocene Reviewed by John Green (essays), The Very Secret Society of Irregular Witches by Sangu Mandanna (fiction)... for watching, if you've not tried Somebody Somewhere on Max, its delightful- sweet without being sacchrine, hilarious, true. And quick, easy watching. Also Shrinking on Apple TV, or if you wanna go dark, Bad Sisters. Broadchurch is older but totally sucked me in when the first time I was down with Covid. I think its on Netflix.
Wishing you softness and rest. It’s such a complicated potion when the body that is known is changed through illness and surgery. Sending many good thoughts.
Sending light. You will feel like yourself again. I promise it gets a little better every day. BTDT. In the meantime we will all miss your distinctive voice and excellent writing!!
Just rest. Let your body heal. Hug your boys and your husband and your parents. Laugh when you can (I'm guessing it will be tough for a while). Watch as much trash as you can handle - and do the same with your reading. Just let yourself veg out and you will come out on the other side. I can guarantee it.
I'm currently reading The Ornithologists Field Guide to Love by India Holton, and it is delightful in many ways. Wishing you speedy healing!
Just watched My Old Ass...finally... and it's really, really good. Charming, sweet, funny and human.
I am watching severance and white lotus along with everyone else it seems!
Bess, I'm on week 4 after total hip replacement at age 54, and had to learn the spiritual lesson all over again that I am not what I accomplish in the course of a day--and that it's ok, nay, EXCELLENT, to be dependent on people who love me and want to care for me.
Being a woman of leisure is less fun than I thought it would be. Nevertheless, I have been reading and watching a lot, including a lot more for sheer entertainment than I thought I would. For sexy, gorgeous, feministy period-piece fun: My Lady Jane. For all the cathartic tears and feminist rage: Maggie O'Farrell's I Am I Am I Am (plus it is very short so you get to feel extra accomplished the day you finish it).
And I've written a book you might like--happy to send you a copy--about the last time I was really laid up (with cancer when my kids were little. TL:DR: I lived!), How to Begin When Your World is Ending: A Spiritual Field Guide to Joy Despite Everything. xo
Goooooo Bess! We love Bess!! Your 60-year-old self will thank you for doing the work now to disentangle your worth from your appearance. A goddamned Sisyphean task if there ever fucking was one.
Sending well wishes.
I surprised myself by getting very into Elsbeth! it's been nice to have a small, funny show since I finished the 5th season of Ghosts (UK).
Gurrllll! Everyone here is suppressing intense curiosity about the specifics, so I will try to be good and do that too although it is hard. I will say that aging is not for the faint of heart and that process actually starts in one’s 30s, not 60s! Things happen, our bodies support us but then alternately betray us. Many of us want to see ourselves as staunch self-advocates but we don’t always know how to when doctors are not interested or when tests come up ambiguous. I’ve recently been through my own version of this and it’s not over… so let’s hug each other and rest and never apologize for tapping out for a while.
So sorry to hear of your health struggles Bess, and wish you much rest and healing. I had sling surgery last year at 37 boy was I in for a rude awakening as to how surgery makes you feel and what my “expected timeline” really was. Be gentle with yourself, day by day ❤️
I watched The Good Place for the first time recently and it was one of my most favorite sitcoms I’ve ever watched. Marcel the Shell with Shoes on is also a delightful movie and when all else fails, you can always watch Veep again!
Also, this probably isn’t news to you but Meryl Streep narrating Heartburn by Nora Ephron is something I come back to over and over again.
The Good Place is an absolute gem.
Ditto on The Good Place! And thanks for mentioning Heartburn.
Prayers and all the good vibes for your smoothe recovery. Reading: Anthropocene Reviewed by John Green (essays), The Very Secret Society of Irregular Witches by Sangu Mandanna (fiction)... for watching, if you've not tried Somebody Somewhere on Max, its delightful- sweet without being sacchrine, hilarious, true. And quick, easy watching. Also Shrinking on Apple TV, or if you wanna go dark, Bad Sisters. Broadchurch is older but totally sucked me in when the first time I was down with Covid. I think its on Netflix.
Somebody Somewhere is so good!
Severance, Call the Midwife, The Floor (Rob Lowe!), Shrinking.. best suggestions this year. May the odds be ever in your favor <3.
Sending you loving, healing thoughts!
I’m sure you’ve read it but Remarkably Bright Creatures is a joy to read. The House in the Cerulean Sea and Anxious People are also joyful novels.
The house in the cerulean sea was truly delightful!
Wishing you softness and rest. It’s such a complicated potion when the body that is known is changed through illness and surgery. Sending many good thoughts.
Sending light. You will feel like yourself again. I promise it gets a little better every day. BTDT. In the meantime we will all miss your distinctive voice and excellent writing!!
Just rest. Let your body heal. Hug your boys and your husband and your parents. Laugh when you can (I'm guessing it will be tough for a while). Watch as much trash as you can handle - and do the same with your reading. Just let yourself veg out and you will come out on the other side. I can guarantee it.
Wishing you refuah shleimah v’refuah haguf.
In Memoriam, by Alice Winn, is the best book I read last year. It was the hyper-fixation of my local bookstore’s staff, and they were smart/right.
Rest & heal, and we will celebrate your robust return.
I'm requesting it on Libby right now, thanks!