Other Texts with Pete Hegseth

A Grudge Report Exclusive

That was not the only groupchat.

LIZ AND MARY’S CLASS FIRST GRADE WHATSAPP

AIDEN’S MOM JEN: Hi, Liz and Mary’s Class! It’s that time of year again - School picture day is THIS Thursday, 3/27. The makeup shoot for individual photos will be 4/4 in the library at 8:30AM. Can’t wait to see everyone’s cuties! 📸 😍

LILY’S MOM: Thx for the reminder! Will try to remember to brush Lily’s hair! 😂

FELIX’S DAD: Gonna attempt a button down for F! 🙏🏻👔

PETE HEGSETH: Aaah 3/27 just got even more high stakes! That’s also when we’re going bomb Yemen lol!!

AIDEN’S MOM IS TYPING: …

NORA’S MOM IS TYPING: …

PETE HEGSETH: 🛩💣💥🔥 Yemen 3/27/25.

BECKETT’S MOM: What???

PETE HEGSETH: Like around 1pm our time, middle of the night Houthi time.

AIDEN’S MOM: Ummmm not sure what this has to do with picture day. Will [REDACTED] be in school?

PETE HEGSETH: Yeah just wanted to let y’all know there’s actually TWO big things going down that day.

HUDSON AND HAYES’ MOM: Good luck, Pete!! 🎯

PETE HEGSETH: Thank you, Allison!! 😘

NORA’S MOM: Pete, should you be telling us this?

PETE HEGSETH: Guys relax it’s WhatsApp so it’s confidential.

FELIX’S DAD: Dude no 😂

PETE HEGSETH: Also this is crazy but we’re thinking about taking out Zelensky soon fwiw.

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NEW MESSAGE FROM YOUR INSTACART SHOPPER

YOUR INSTACART SHOPPER HAS SENT YOU A PHOTO

Ben L: They don’t have the Pineapple Spindrift. Do any of these work?

PETE HEGSETH: Lemon is fine.

BEN L: Ok! They have single cans of Pineapple in the cooler if you want me to grab those?

PETE HEGSETH: K

BEN L: How many?

PETE HEGSETH: I don’t know 6??

BEN L: They only have 5.

PETE HEGSETH: THEN FIVE! I’m sorry I can’t talk about this all day I’m literally in the Situation Room looking at a map of the area in YEMEN where we are about to bomb.

PETE HEGSETH HAS SENT A PHOTO

BEN L: Wow.

PETE HEGSETH HAS SENT ANOTHER PHOTO

BEN L: That looks like a residential area??

PETE HEGSETH: Yeah of freaking terrorists!

BEN L: But regular people live there too right? Like kids etc?

PETE HEGSETH: Boo hoo 🦅💥🇺🇸

BEN L: Sorry, looks like they only have Coconut La Croix.

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DM FROM BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN

BRUCESPRINGST33NOFFICIAL321: Hi! I noticed your profile and it’s really cool. Your content is awesome and exactly what I am looking for. I wanted to reach out and see if you wanted an exclusive VIP access pass to my next tour. Being a famous singer and rock star is lonely, and I am a genuine person looking to connect. You could get great content for your page and we could be friends. Are you in??? I need to know now.

PETE HEGSETH: How do I know this is really Bruce Springsteen?

BRUCESPRINGST33NOFFICIAL321: I have a verified check mark.

PETE HEGSETH: Nice try. Anyone can get that.

BRUCESPRINGST33NOFFICIAL321: It is me! You are being unkind and that is making me not want to extend this VIP offer to you! Here is a picture of me taken right now, just chilling at my home in New Jersey.

[BRUCESPRINGST33NOFFICIAL321 HAS SENT A PHOTO]

PETE HEGSETH: Omg. Bruce!! The Boss!! So good to see you again!!!!!!!! We actually met briefly in 1998 at a concert in Tallahassee.

BRUCESPRINGST33NOFFICIAL321: Yes, I remember that event. Nice to talk to you again, friend. 🥰

PETE HEGSETH: This is awesome. And of course I’d be STOKED to hang out next tour. When is it?

BRUCESPRINGST33NOFFICIAL321: It’s actually Thursday, 3/27.

PETE HEGSETH: Oh man. That’s when we bomb Yemen.

BRUCESPRINGST33NOFFICIAL321: …

PETE HEGSETH: Do u have any other tour dates? Can go international too.

META ERROR: THE ACCOUNT BRUCESPRINGST33NOFFICIAL321 DOES NOT EXIST