An LA-Based Wellness Influencer's Tips On Being Happy
It's really heaven on earth with the right mindset!
Hi! I’m Lizzie Schraeder Dunn and I’m so thrilled Bess agreed to let me guest post from her Substack when she was pass-out drunk on three glasses of wine at a mutual friend’s birthday party where it was loud and she was nervous. I’ve never heard of her or her writing (Although she tells me she wrote a book about how to talk on the phone to an elderly person! Aww!!) , but she’s so sweet and you can tell she’s close to getting a handle on her curly hair! She mentioned she left LA because “her home really is New York” and some of the moms at an LA preschool open house were “a little terrifying” but I am a firm believer that anyone can be happy anywhere, you just have any of the following, in order of importance:
Gratitude
A silenced (or at least QUIETED) inner critic.
Self-compassion
A very rich father
A very famous father
A niche famous father
A rich mother (her dad was rich)
A rich mother (self-made/famous)
A tribe of close friends
A meditation practice
Tasteful, barely perceptible Botox
Several androgynously-named children
A creative outlet
Truly infinite resources with which to pursue that creative outlet
A full suite of Aesop cleansing products
The ability to forgive
Face-framing, hand-painted highlights
A rich husband who will stay with you until the kids are grown
A rich husband who will not stay with you but you have no prenup and a friendship with someone who knows Laura Wasser
Access to nature!
A luxury SUV
A $400 slouchy cotton cardigan
A community that lifts you up
A paid partnership with a “clean cosmetics” company
Adaptogens
Generosity
A charity that throws galas
A belief in rose quartz or topaz
An assistant who studied acting at Northwestern
James Franco following you on Instagram
A long Natalie Martin caftan
A short Natalie Martin caftan
Patience
Hope
A plane
Oh, Nat sounds like a really special person, a rides-the-short-bus-and-licks-the-windows-even-if-they’re-wide-open special person. I would add a 36th item. “Posess not a shred of sincerity” and a 37th, “Be as shallow as a saucer.” I am always influenced by the influencers to ignore them much as I would take no notice of the hum of my refrigerator going about its business of refrigerating.
I could really use one of those $400 dollar sweaters…